Sunday, January 27, 2008

Taking it day by day

The last couple of weeks have been really rough, and I've been taking it very slowly and just one day at a time. Two weeks ago "a" was sick, the following Monday I missed work as I was feverish and in and out of things all day. Tuesday (btw this is the week of the layoffs...) I had to work from home as "a" took a turn for the worse... ended up with a sinus infection and taking meds...

Wednesday I only worked until about 11:30 as I had a dentist appt for a root canal (of all things). Thursday there was an ice storm. Friday I was finally back in the office to hear the layoff new... btw although my fever was gone, the cold wasn't.... I've only been squeaking my way through the days with a rough voice, sore throat, sinus pain & pressure... etc. It stunk. Spent the weekend pretty laid back... but the following week... although free of all the "stuff" that fills my day, I've come home every day after work and just crashing. I've been grumpy and moody (pms) besides the tired and sick... just miserable. I spent the whole day yesterday in bed and it felt SO GOOD! Today, I'm not doing anything amazing, but getting out of bed and blogging and washing a load of clothes feels a little like a small miracle given how I have been feeling. Thankfully, I'm finally feeling like I'm going to get over this cold after all.

Yesterday my period finally started and I spent the entire time struggling and spent most of my day with a heating pad. I'm finally going at the end of the week to see what options I have. My last gyno pretty much threw out any option other than hysterectomy including ovaries... but since I can't do HRT, I am SO not ready for instant menopause. Maybe in the past I couldn't even think about it as an option... however, as things keep getting worse and worse... I'm starting to think about it. Just not sure that I can handle it, but then again... here I am suffering anyway about two weeks out of every month not including the PMS ... and sooner or later I am going to go through menopause too... do I really want to endure what I'm enduring and still go through menopause without HRT? I am at least open to now thinking about it.

Given that my problems are EXTREME bleeding - like I can only wear overnights now, and I have to change them every three hours(thank you warfarin); EXTREME cramping (thank you endometriosis AND fibroids)... I can't take midol nor anything with ibuprofen in it (thanks again warfarin)... add to it getting LONG periods about twice a month... and I pretty much am in hell. But, it doesn't stop there, oh, no. Of course not. I get serious diahrea every single time I get my period. It starts a day or two before my period, and continues through my entire period... (no wonder I'm iron deficient and etc...) and now? Now, I also get serious nausea with it. Yes, that means I'm in the bathroom more than any other room of my house now. I can barely keep anything down, AND everything I eat exits one way or the other about ten minutes after I eat.

It's been getting worse and worse... but to be honest, considering everything else I've been going through - it was low on my list of complaints for a long time. Now that my health is starting to behave itself and I am now able to function, I now have the "capacity" to do something about this. I used to take birth control pills to avoid having my cycle every 14 days... but those are out; as are HRT with my clotting risks... there are some other procedures that might help with the bleeding, but most of them won't help with endometriosis... and just from my web searches so far, it seems a lot of the non-surgical treatments for it are also not advised if you are at risk for clotting.... yeah. But, who knows, maybe my gynecologist will be up on the latest of late options and can come up with a good solution. I can only hope.

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