My patience is wearing thin, but as much as I complain, I'm fully aware that he's not really looking for work more because of the fact that he knows he's going to spend some time in jail soon. And, while you & I and the whole world knows that isn't a restriction for working - he thinks it is. UGH. But it's only a couple of weeks before he goes back to jail, so I can try to be patient.
But, we have had the discussion that we are not going to spend another six months post-jail doing this.
Secondly, he's really having a dose of confidence failure. He doesn't think he can do anything, he doesn't think anyone will hire him. Of course, he's not doing much to help his cause, which is my argument.... which is falling on deaf ears.
The jobs he has applied for? things like Catering Manger at the local Executive Suites... as if he has a chance at that kind of job?
Anyway, my latest mantra is that I'm fully aware his brain has been turned off and that it may take 5-6 years for it to start to function again. In the meantime, I need to make him function one way or another.
So, here's my plan. Post-jail term - he has two weeks of full support from me to find work. If he's working at the end of the two weeks, we're a-ok. If he's not - he loses the internet (means I lose it too, but I'm thinking its going to be short-term). Then, he's got two more weeks - if he's working at the end, we turn the internet back on... if not? Then he loses his phone. Two more weeks - if not working? He loses the car, if working he gains the phone & the internet. Still not working in two weeks? He's out of the house. The end. I'm going to type this up & have it ready for him to sign that he agrees to those terms. And, he's going to have to sign the agreement before moving back home from post-jail. If he won't sign the agreement, I have no problem refusing to let him live with me.